April 26th

Call and Response

Can I get a comment?

April 25th

Which is the bliss of solitude;

 

I remembered your birthday

The day after it never happened

And made it memorable

You said you’d never forget

The daffodils

 From Asda

Two bunches  

£1.50

24th April

What I will be doing forty years from now

I am on the bus to school
Trying to complete my English homework
Write a poem titled
What I will be doing forty years from now

April 23rd

How you know things may be coming to an end

Is that a poem you're writing?
Is it about Me?
The answers in no particular order are
Yes and No

22nd April

The trouble with poetry

Everybody writes it
Nobody reads it

21st April

The Magician's Assistant

My mother believed
You should never reveal
The secrets of a magic trick
True to her word
She never explained how
She made my father
Disappear

20th April

A unread poem
like a virgin deserted
at the altar

April 19th

He carries his unhappiness
with him
like a snail its shell
Quick to withdraw
he curls tightly
alone

April 18th

In 2010 I told the story of Modigliani and Akhmatova

 to a woman in the bar of the Paris Ritz

who spoke little English

who took me to her room

where we shared our loneliness

April 17th

Mayakovsky

 

Help

I‘ve lost a poem

I put it down somwhere

I t had ten or so lines

Concerning the death of Frank O’Hara

And the fragility of everything

It’s times like this

I miss you the most

Nothing makes sense

If anyone finds the poem

Please treat it like one of your own

April 16th

The game

Paper wraps stone
Scissors cut paper
Stone blunts scissors
He wraps her
She cuts him
Together they live

Their blunted lives

 

April 15th

Hollywood Ending

In this poem
You are played by Ingrid Bergman
And I am played by Humphrey Bogart
Nobody says 'Play it again Sam'
As the poem ends
You leave with a more handsome man to save Europe
Some day I'll understand this

April 14th

All you need to know about beards

For some a beard is
their greatest achievement for
others it is a sign of surrender.

April 13th

The Burden of High Standards

This is a poem of small ambition
Perfectly achieved

April 12th

A slow night speed dating in the last chance saloon.

 

Thepoem is set in the upstairs room of a busy pub. Sounds  general pub hubbub.

These are brutally interrupted by an over amplified voice crackling over the PA system

ORGANISER: Time to move on. This is your last five minute date. Please remember to hand in your forms before you leave. Everybody in position?  Right start dating.

Music from another room can be heard in the background. It is Tom Waits singing ‘I hope I don’t fall in love with you.’

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtLVXBqfqBY

MAN: Fat Eskimo

WOMAN: What?

MAN: Obese Inuit

WOMAN: You need a better opening line.

MAN: Sorry, it was meant to be an icebreaker.

April 11th

Apples

 

 

It is Sunday morning

And the sun is shining

I am sitting in the garden

You are all welcome to join me

There are apples lying on the grass

It has been a good year for apples

I have apples enough for all of you

Please take one

Enjoy its cold sweetness

I can get more chairs

The grass is still wet

You are probably thinking

What has this got to do with anything?

Listen

Can you hear the sounds of your neighbours’ lives?

Can you embrace their otherness?

Enjoy the sound

The silence will last much longer

April 10th

A Simple Case of Murder

You saw me from The High Window
Giving The Little Sister
More than The Long Goodbye kiss
She became The Lady in the Lake
And the last words I heard were Farewell My Lovely
As you sent me to The Big Sleep

April 9th

Everyone I have never kissed

I can't remember the name
Of the girl I first kissed
But I remember the kiss

April 8th

Flowers and Mountains

Love is not a flower

 To be picked but is a

Mountain to be climbed

April 7th

Walking down Bone Mill Lane

It is easier to write a poem called

What I do not know about love.

Rabbi Burns for example understood

That what women wanted

Were similes and promises of love

Linked to improbable geographical events

April 6th

My one night stand with Dorothy Parker

All men want the woman they marry not to change

Whereas all women believe they can change

The man they marry for the better.

The secret of a successful marriage is

When

             both

                       partners

                                          learn

                                                     to

                                                          live

                                                                  with

                                                                            their

                                                                                       disappointment.

April 5th

I can hear the mermaids singing

Sit quietly in a chair with both feet on the ground and your hands in your lap. Allow yourself to feel centred in the chair. Bring all of your attention to the physical act of breathing. Start to notice the breath as it enters your body through your nose and travels to your lungs. Notice with curiosity the sound of your breathing. Wonder if it is the sound of normal breathing or the early stages of emphysema. Listen to the sound of your heart beating. Notice with curiosity the irregular beat and tingling sensations running through your body. Notice with curiosity how your tinnitus drowns out the wheezing of your lungs and thumping of your heart. Slowly allow your awareness to drift. Start to feel like you have fallen overboard from a ship that is sailing away towards the horizon. Breathe in deeply. Feel yourself inflate. You have become a lifeboat. Now head for the shore.

April 4th

Why I am not a plumber

I sometimes confess to people

I am a plumber.

I have had no formal training in plumbing

but I feel we all have the ability to plumb.

I plumb mainly for myself but

sometimes I show my plumbing to people.

Not many get it

they just see pipes.

They don’t connect.

April 3rd

This is just to say

I am wearing
the pants
that were in your
underwear drawer

And which
you were probably
saving
for tonight

Forgive me
they were clean
and smelt
of Persil

April 2nd

Him and Her

He tries reason

She says he’s cold

He tries an embrace

She says she can’t breathe

He gives her his heart

She says what a bloody mess

April 1st

Abracadabra

You think love is a magic trick

I put my cards on the table

You want to look up my sleeves

From beneath my cloak I produce

Flowers doves rabbits

Rings of silver and gold

In the end

You climb into the box

And I saw you in half